Friday, February 04, 2011


Sometimes not all of us will get along with everyone we come into contact with. Although I do find myself wanting to please everyone all of the time, I have come to realize that not everyone will like me nor will I like everyone I meet.

However, when that certain person is family, it can make the situation difficult. I have found it difficult in the past to tell people how I really feel. Even if I have told someone how I really felt, the situation only changed briefly and then went back to the way it initially was. So nothing changed. The reason why nothing was changing was because I wasn't saying what I really wanted and needed to say. In essence, I was afraid that I would hurt their feelings.

I was skirting around the real issue which as we all know never creates the desired outcome. And yes, I do understand that even if I did speak my mind and say what I really wanted to say, there would be no guarantee that I would end up with the desired outcome either. It might even make the situation worse.

Let me tell you this…. Nothing is as important as the truth. If this person loves me as much as they say they do, nothing should stop me from telling them how I feel. For years I have been sacrificing my happiness just to keep this person from giving me grief.

I truly believe that in most circumstances if you say what is in your heart and lead with your heart and deliver what you have to say in a loving and respectful way, you will, more often than not, receive the outcome you desire. Of course, not everyone is receptive to your words or feelings, which means they aren’t willing or ready to take responsibility for their part. In a situation like that, I simply chose to stay in love and remain patient.

I truly believe that some people are in our life for a season and/or a reason. If things do not change over time, well, sometimes the hard decision has to be made to let that person go - depending on the severity of the circumstances, even if they are family. It isn't the best resolution but sometimes it may be the best decision in the circumstances.

Here is my test of finally letting someone go: Family is family is family but if they are toxic or abusive (verbally, emotionally or physically), you might think about letting them go......


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