Friday, February 25, 2011

Demanding Diva

All of us have been there. Self doubt, negative thoughts, beating ourselves up when we are feeling depressed. I believe it is about time we start being a bit demanding. BUT not in the way you think. I am talking about treating ourselves with respect, value, and fortitude. We expect people to treat this way, why not from ourselves. I think it is time we DEMAND the same treatment from ourselves. Don’t you agree?

If we want to feel better about ourselves, the first thing we need do is stop being our own worst enemy. Truly….We need to stop getting down on ourselves when things do not go our way. We all are extraordinary people on an exciting journey, in the middle of creating a life that we want or have created. So why do we put up with the negative thoughts or self-bashing. I know it is easy to tear ourselves down when we gain a few pounds or make a mistake. But the path of low-esteem is not the road any of us should be on. We need to relentlessly remind ourselves that we were born for a purpose and God made us in His image. Isn’t that alone something to celebrate?

Personally, I know it is easier said than done. Self-bashing can come very easily to those who are perfectionist. But harsh thoughts and words never go away and quite frankly that is not the legacy I want to leave behind. I want people to know me as a beautiful woman, inside and out. How I let my light shine every day and that included not beating myself up over my faults or weaknesses.

So demand kindness and love from yourself. God loves each and every one of us. I remind myself everyday that God’s grace is enough because I am most in wonder of God’s grace when I am most aware of how little I deserve it … and nothing I do (whether in terms of my actions, or just beating myself up) can make me deserve that grace any more.

Friday, February 04, 2011


Kevin's nephew Spencer
February 1, 2011

Introducing the newest member of the Coutu family, Spencer Michael. Aaaah, what a baby doll. Is it possible to love someone that you have never met? Brings tears to my eyes just thinking of him.

Congratulations to the new Mommy and Daddy, Chrissy and Mike. <3 <3


Sometimes not all of us will get along with everyone we come into contact with. Although I do find myself wanting to please everyone all of the time, I have come to realize that not everyone will like me nor will I like everyone I meet.

However, when that certain person is family, it can make the situation difficult. I have found it difficult in the past to tell people how I really feel. Even if I have told someone how I really felt, the situation only changed briefly and then went back to the way it initially was. So nothing changed. The reason why nothing was changing was because I wasn't saying what I really wanted and needed to say. In essence, I was afraid that I would hurt their feelings.

I was skirting around the real issue which as we all know never creates the desired outcome. And yes, I do understand that even if I did speak my mind and say what I really wanted to say, there would be no guarantee that I would end up with the desired outcome either. It might even make the situation worse.

Let me tell you this…. Nothing is as important as the truth. If this person loves me as much as they say they do, nothing should stop me from telling them how I feel. For years I have been sacrificing my happiness just to keep this person from giving me grief.

I truly believe that in most circumstances if you say what is in your heart and lead with your heart and deliver what you have to say in a loving and respectful way, you will, more often than not, receive the outcome you desire. Of course, not everyone is receptive to your words or feelings, which means they aren’t willing or ready to take responsibility for their part. In a situation like that, I simply chose to stay in love and remain patient.

I truly believe that some people are in our life for a season and/or a reason. If things do not change over time, well, sometimes the hard decision has to be made to let that person go - depending on the severity of the circumstances, even if they are family. It isn't the best resolution but sometimes it may be the best decision in the circumstances.

Here is my test of finally letting someone go: Family is family is family but if they are toxic or abusive (verbally, emotionally or physically), you might think about letting them go......