INSTRUMENT OF LOVE

When we were young, we realized that having friends was important to us. Some of us even had imaginary friends or had pets that we were close to and were our best friends. The need for friends continued as we grew into our teens and began to find our own identities. Friends were a big part of forming our personalities and supporting who we had become. As adults, it is still important for us to have friends. Friends, outside of family bonds, can be our greatest comfort and allies.

True friends are people who like us in spite of our faults and who listen to us and tell us the truth. They support the choices we make in life and tell us when we are being irrational. They laugh and cry with us and share all the special moments. They are buddies and share the same interests. However, they also will argue with us without retribution. They are people we are not afraid of telling our secret wishes to or what is really on our minds.

You do not have to have tons of friends. One true friend is all you need at times. Sometimes, however, it is good to have a group of friends so you can be a part of the bond among you without having to work so hard at friendship. You all then can share a part of the duties of being friends. Sometimes, you are the one at the center of attention (God forbid). SMILES! At other times, you can just go along, but all of you are loyal to each other and help each other when you can.

Friends are your support system. When you can depend on friends, you feel safe and cherished. In essence, you belong. Friends offer unconditional love, acceptance and emotional support. Friends also can help you to reduce stress. Not only do they listen to us when we need to vent, but they also provide much needed diversion from what is stressing us out. Participating in shared interests and activities with friends helps us forget about problems at work or at home. For a brief time, we can lose ourselves in their company and perhaps laugh and breathe easier. Have you ever laughed so hard you cried? I have and it is one of the best feelings in the world!

I try to be the type of friend I described above and I truly hope those of you who read my blog believe this to be true. I want to be an instrument of love to everyone I meet. We might not “click” with everyone we meet, but we can show them love nevertheless. Every person can be or become an instrument of love and peace in any given moment of life by intentionally choosing to focus their mind positive in love and gratitude, in thought, word and action. We do not have to be alike to be loved or to give love. Each of us has different gifts and the key is to not grieve over the gifts we do not have, but to take those we do have and use them in honoring God.

COLLECTIVE SIGH

Okay, I want everyone to collectively inhale, take a long deep breath, now exhale. Okay? Feel any better? Everywhere I turn, everywhere I go, everyone seems stressed out. The way I see it is, there are four ways we all can deal with the stress: lash out at others (bad, bad choice) or laugh it off, shrug it off or roll with the punches. I know at times it is easier said than done. For instance, I find it hard to deal with people who work in customer service, but don’t give you that “customer” service. When people are rude to me, it really sets me off because I would never think of treating someone like that. When we are treated like that, however, we have to consciously fight off the negativity in our lives, to make sure it doesn't consume us. It really can take over and bring us down and put us in a funk. Not good, not good at all!

If you have heard of the "pay it forward" concept where if you do something nice, then others will do something nice as well, I think the same is true of being rude or angry. If you are rude and angry, then others will pick up on that negativity. Seems like the last couple of weeks, I have run into a lot of people in just foul moods. I have had people be rude to me when I did nothing to provoke it. I have one lady in my office building who will push me out of her way to get on the elevator. She is an elderly lady who just charges forward. I have learned to wait for another elevator. Once she hit me in the head with her umbrella. Seriously! :-) Did I take it personally? No, because I didn’t provoke her. I was just on my way up to my floor. I chalk it up to people not being happy in their own life. I have also overheard people being rude and disrespectful to other shoppers and store clerks. Have you ever went into a grocery store and had someone “refuse” to move their cart? I have even after saying excuse me about five times. It becomes quite alarmingly that there are a lot of people out there who just don’t care who they offend. Sometimes we can let the behavior of others, get to us. I find myself “checking” my attitude a lot. I don’t need the negativity in my life. Who wants to be in a funk? I sure don’t. I tend to be upbeat and positive most of the time but when you get placed into these situations, how do you react?

My plan of action. I am going to work really hard to fight off the negativity thrown my way. I am going to rise above it. I am going to make even more of an effort to smile at those who are grumpy and in a foul mood, even if it makes them grumpier. :-) I am going to let drivers into my lane with a friendly wave (I know this is a hard one for me Kevin), and if someone lets me into a lane, I will make sure to give them a friendly wave. I am going to compliment someone today. I am going to be pleasant to everyone I encounter. Simply, I am going to pay it forward with kindness. Maybe it will catch on.

FATHER’S DAY: Happy Father's Day to all you wonderful Fathers out there. Especially to my Dad, Jerry and Kevin's Dad, Sheldon. Simply the best you two!

Yesterday we went to a combo Father's Day celebration/7th Birthday Party (my nephew’s Zach's birthday)over at David and Debbie's house! We had a blast. David enjoyed BBQing for everyone and we pretty much sat outside and enjoyed the weather. It was a bit hot but with the wind and the kids playing in the sprinkler, it was pleasant enough. They had tons of delicious food there and the company was enjoyable. It is always great to hang out with my brothers and their families and laugh! Good times!

FENCE UPDATE: Kevin has the fence up and just has to connect the posts to the neighbor’s fence. Even though it wasn’t my idea for him to take on such a daunting task, I am proud of him for sticking with it even though in his words it was “the worst decision he ever made.” The fence looks great and Stoli will be the happiest dog in the world. He finally will have his yard back after almost a year! He told me he “woofs” (loves) his Daddy! :-)

MY PICASSO

"There are painters who transform the sun to a yellow spot, but there are others who with the help of their art and their intelligence, transform a yellow spot into the sun.”-Pablo Picasso

We all have something that we are good at. Sometimes it is so obvious that we don’t realize it. Some of my talents are: Making people feel happy, Writing letters, poems, stories,…listening (really listening) to friends and family, using computers, remembering numbers, although I stink at math. :-) They may not be creative talents like sewing or painting, but they are still considered talents.

Talent is not something that everyone understands. Talent used to be a unit of measurement and it now it refers to a gift or unique characteristic that a person has. In a society so in love with individuality, why is it that so many people do not feel special or like they have any talents. Why is it that a lot of people that are special in one way or another strive so hard to just be just the opposite? Why can’t they just accept themselves for who they are?

I believe in many different things: we are all unique, everyone has something to offer us (not material things), all of us are capable of great things. I think it is a personal choice once we know we have a talent to widen it into something positive. Knowledge is something that can be attained, but talent is something we are born with. Be certain to not put away your talents and forget about them. You never know how many people you could have an impact on.

Kevin has a talent of starting home projects and turning them into learning experiences. :-) Right now, his latest project is attempting to install our fence. After renting an auger AND a jackhammer, let’s just say he now wishes we hired someone professionally. Now, it is too late because we spent way too much money on the materials and need to just suck it up and see it through completion regardless of the pain we go through. I think by the end of summer (Kevin wanted me to insert Spring here but I won’t do it) it should be up! We can only hope! :-)